Kernelless Code

When all that's left is your code, nothing else can get in your way.

Being a software engineer is hard. We get that. That's why Kernelless Cloud is dedicated to making it easier. Our software directly translets your code into the server's processor. Doesn't the purity make you shiver? It makes us shiver, that's for sure.

If you're confused about how kernelless works, let me explain it to you in terms your puny mind can understand. You give us your code. We run it. What's so fucking hard to get? It's exactly as though you had given your code to your Windows 98 machine and double-clicked it. It would just run, right? This is exactly like that.

You still don't get it. It's fine. We understand not everyone learns the same way. Here's a a picture for all the visual learners.

It's not our fault that the architecture diagram is so dense that cramming it into this 300x300 square causes it to become solid black. There are boxes in there. And arrows. Shitloads of them. More than you've ever seen in your entire life. All of that complexity is what allows Kernelless to operate so efficiently.

Efficiency is Asymptotic

Quantum computing? Hahahahahahaha!

We've discovered a new upper bound in complexity—optimizations upon optimizations—that allows your code to run at infinite efficiency. When you abstract away literally everything, especially the kernel, your code runs faster than previously imaginable.

Code Transletion

With the Kernelless Cloud, we use a special technique called "code transletion." This is the process where code turns into a representation that it can be run without a kernel. This proprietary, patent-pending (i.e. the writing of the patent proposal is pending) technology is the cornerstone of the infinite performance gains of kernelless. Transletion is also the cornerstone of the automatic debugging process that you can experience for yourself in our open beta.